What is fulfillment? Our culture often defines it as the arrival at a grand destination. It’s the day you get the promotion, buy the house, publish the book, or finally reach that "happily ever after." We operate under the assumption that fulfillment is a prize you are awarded at the end of a long and arduous journey. As a result, we spend most of our lives feeling unfulfilled, endlessly striving for a future moment of arrival that is always just over the horizon.
Andy Weir’s The Martian offers a radical and much more satisfying alternative. For Mark Watney, stranded alone on an entire planet, there is no grand destination. His ultimate goal is simply to survive until a rescue mission that is years away and has a razor-thin chance of success. If fulfillment were a destination, his story would be one of abject misery. Yet, Watney experiences profound moments of what can only be described as joy and fulfillment. His secret is that he redefines fulfillment not as a destination, but as the act of making progress on a meaningful frontier.
He is, quite literally, an explorer in an uncharted land. Every single thing he does is a first for humanity. This realization provides him with a powerful and ongoing source of purpose, even in the midst of his terror and loneliness. He captures this unique mindset in one of his logs:
"It's a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I'm the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn't moved in a million years! I'm the first guy to drive long-distance on Mars. The first guy to spend more than thirty-one sols on Mars. The first guy to grow crops on Mars. First, first, first!"
This is the voice of a man who has discovered the secret to sustainable fulfillment. He isn't waiting for the rescue ship to arrive to feel a sense of accomplishment. He is finding it every single sol, in every single action. By framing his journey as a series of "firsts," he transforms mundane acts of survival into historic moments of exploration. Kicking a rock is not a meaningless gesture; it's a profound interaction with a new world. Driving the rover is not a tedious chore; it's a pioneering expedition.
This mindset is available to all of us. We may not be on Mars, but we all have frontiers in our lives—areas of our careers, relationships, and personal growth that are uncharted territory for us. Your frontier might be starting a new business, learning a new skill, becoming a parent, or healing from a past trauma. These are the spaces where we can experience the "first, first, first" feeling that Watney describes.
Fulfillment isn't found in being the best in the world; it's found in being the first in your world. The first time you successfully run a team meeting. The first time you cook a new recipe. The first time you set a healthy boundary with a family member. These are all acts of "kicking a rock" on a new planet. They are moments of personal colonization, where you are bravely stepping into the unknown and leaving your footprint.
The modern world, with its endless social comparison, robs us of this feeling. We see others who are further along on their journey and we discount our own small, pioneering steps. Watney had the gift of having no one to compare himself to. He was the only data point. What if we could grant ourselves that same gift? What if we could focus on our own personal frontier and celebrate our own series of "firsts," without worrying about what anyone else is doing? That is the path to a life that feels not like a long wait for a distant reward, but like a continuous, thrilling, and deeply fulfilling exploration.
Mindful Steps to Cultivate Fulfillment Now
Fulfillment is not a future event; it's a present-moment practice. It's about learning to see the frontier in your own life and celebrating the progress you are making. Here are three tips to adopt a "first, first, first" mindset.
1. Chart Your Personal "Firsts"
We are so focused on our big, audacious goals that we fail to notice the hundreds of small, pioneering steps we take every week. The practice of charting your "firsts" is about intentionally acknowledging this progress.
Get a journal and dedicate a section to your "Log of Firsts." At the end of each day or each week, write down at least three things you did for the first time. The quote from Watney is your guide—celebrate everything, no matter how small.
"First time I spoke up with a new idea in the Monday meeting."
"First time I tried that new yoga pose."
"First time I kicked that particular rock in my neighborhood."
This practice retrains your brain to look for progress instead of deficits. It shifts your focus from the long, intimidating journey ahead to the brave step you took today. Fulfillment is the accumulated feeling of all these small, meaningful firsts. When you start tracking them, you'll realize you're already living a more fulfilling life than you think.
2. Define Your "Mars"
Watney’s sense of purpose came from his clear, compelling mission: colonize Mars, survive, and get home. What is your "Mars"? What is the personal frontier in your life right now that gives you a sense of purpose? It's the big, meaningful challenge you are currently working on. It could be your career, a creative project, your family, or your personal healing journey.
Take some time to define your "Mars" in a single, inspiring sentence. For example:
"My Mars is building a coaching business that helps people find meaningful work."
"My Mars is learning to treat myself with compassion."
Write this sentence down and put it somewhere you can see it every day. The quote is filled with an energy that comes from a deep sense of purpose. When you are clear on your "Mars," the small, daily tasks are no longer chores; they are vital parts of a grand mission. Answering a difficult email isn't just a task; it's an act of colonizing your career frontier. Having a patient conversation with your child isn't just a duty; it's an act of colonizing a loving family life. This reframing infuses your daily life with the kind of epic meaning Watney felt every single sol.
3. Celebrate the "Rock Kick"
How can you think differently about what constitutes an achievement? Our society tells us to only celebrate the big wins—the launch, the graduation, the finish line. Watney teaches us to celebrate kicking a rock. A "rock kick" is a small, seemingly insignificant action that proves you are still moving, still trying, still engaging with your frontier.
Your challenge is to identify and celebrate at least one "rock kick" every day. The celebration doesn't have to be elaborate. It can be a moment of mindful acknowledgment.
When you choose to go for a walk instead of staying on the couch, pause and say to yourself, "I'm kicking a rock for my health."
When you delete a nasty comment from an email you're writing, acknowledge, "I'm kicking a rock for better communication."
When you read one page of a book instead of scrolling on your phone, recognize, "I'm kicking a rock for my own growth."
The feeling of fulfillment in the quote comes from the sheer volume of his accomplishments, both large and small. By celebrating the "rock kicks," you create a constant stream of small wins. This builds a powerful sense of momentum and self-efficacy. It proves to you, on a daily basis, that you are a pioneer on your own frontier. And that is the very essence of a fulfilling life.
Watney's fulfillment came from his drive to survive—a continuous, messy process that required constant tending to his physical and mental state. In our next article, we take a rugged look at the reality of sustainable balance, challenging the myth of tranquility to understand how to truly function in a life of "terror and strife."
